Sexual inequality. It has existed forever. Eve tempts Adam to eat the apple, he eats it, she’s the bad guy. One of the very first stories in human history has a woman being blamed for the fall from grace of the entire human race! And now, here we are thousands of years later, and we still have this divide in how men and women are viewed, and none more so than in the theatre of sexual politics.
So I was reading a blog this week by a blogger I only know as ‘Girl on the net’ (check out her blog at girlonthenet.com). As is usual with half the stuff I come across, I stumbled across her Twitter account by accident because it was recommended to me by whatever search engine does these things. Her blog is all about sex. Specifically her own escapades. It’s really, really good and I recommend it if you like a bit of filth in your life. Obviously don’t read it if you’re proverbial knickers get in a twist over these sorts of things. Now I like it for a few reasons. Firstly, I like the fact she’s a woman who completely owns her sexuality; she is completely raw and passionate with how she talks about sex which I always find a turn on, and secondly because she’s real. It’s real views and real life stories from real life situations.
I can totally relate to this, being in the midst of trying to get a book published which is aaaaaaaall about love, lust and getting freaky. There’s nothing I love writing about more than sexual exploits and anything and everything related to the game we all love to play.
Somehow, sex is still a taboo subject.
So it got me thinking. Why don’t I? I mean I know I write about relationships and sex, but I always censor myself a bit. Even ‘Girl on the net’ has a page where she asks people who know her or who find out who she is to keep it quiet. See this is the issue, even in today’s society in which sexual experimentation has never been more acceptable and in which both men and women are exploring sexual desires to a greater degree than ever before, somehow, sex is still a taboo subject.
So today, I thought fuck it. I’m tired of writing for other people and not for myself. Tired of worrying what friends on Facebook might think, or uptight neighbours or work colleagues or whoever the fuck else. My blog. My rules. If you don’t like it, as my man Bernie Mac would have said, have a coke and a smile and shut the fuck up!
I love sex. Always have. Obviously everyone thinks that, but I mean I really love it. Every naughty, kinky bit of it. I love that you can have slow, hot, meaningful sex with one chick and it be amazing, and then have hard, rough, bed breaking sex with another and love it just as much. I think sex is about exploration. Seriously, what’s the fucking point in having generic vanilla sex your whole life, ruling out things that you’ve never even tried because of some preconceived notion of what it would be like, or more likely, because of a stigma attached to it. I’ve always said I’d try most things once, because I’ve always considered sex to be about finding excitement, not just going through the motions. Hair pulling, going down, sixty nines, money shots, anal, up against the wall, anything goes, hard, rough, this way, that way, tied up, back scratching, heart pounding, intense, sweaty no limit sex. Basically, it’s all good. But here’s the thing. I’m a dude, I’m allowed to say that right? No one cares when a guy is like that, apart from a little bit of judgement from the aforementioned which now that I think about I couldn’t find one fuck to give anyway. So why is it still different for women?
Despite a lot of girls feeling the same way, they have to pretend that they don’t.
What I find ridiculous and infinitely annoying is that despite a lot of girls feeling the same way, they have to pretend that they don’t. If I wrote a blog saying the same things ‘Girl on the net’ does, and had my picture plastered all over it, as long as I didn’t mind a few snide looks and a bit of gossip at work, no one would care that much. But when a woman says that kind of stuff, you get all these prudish, judgemental fuckwits who want to paint that woman out as a slut. Or easy. On behalf of sexually liberated women everywhere, go fuck yourself.
Seriously, if a girl likes anal, or threesomes, foursomes or even full blown orgies why does that make her a slut? Her personal sexual preferences are just that; personal. Just like a person’s sexual orientation, it’s completely her own business. More prevalent, if you’re one of these people passing judgement, why the fuck do you even care? It probably says more about you then it does about them, and I’d spend more time worrying about yourself anyway, because if you’re that uptight, then your own sex life is probably about as interesting as watching a slow motion replay of paint drying. And you probably know it.
Honestly, a dude sleeps with ten girls on a holiday, it’s high fives and fist nudges. A girl sleeps with half that and she’s a whore? Please. It’s just utter bullshit. Some of the freakiest girls I know are also the classiest.
So to conclude, if being judgemental and sexually repressed is what it takes to be in the socially acceptable corner, you can take your corner and jog on.
I’ll just be over here with the rest of the ‘whores’ and ‘reprobates’ not giving one sideways fuck.