Are you actually any good at foreplay?

Obviously most people are going to think that their foreplay is on point. I mean you’ve been having sex for however many years and you can’t be that bad at it or someone would have said by now right? But bad foreplay isn’t necessarily about technique. Don’t get me wrong, if you couldn’t find her clit with a map or you use his nuts like they were stress balls then there is definitely going to be issues that go far beyond the point of this post! For the main part though, good foreplay is about knowing your partners body, putting in the time, and having an understanding of why that time is important.

Now don’t get me wrong, no one is saying that there is something wrong with having a quicky. Sometimes bending/being bent over in the shower and having a quick, hard few minutes of fun is just what the doctor ordered! But there is a reason it’s called ‘a quicky’, and not just called ‘sex’. It’s not supposed to be the norm. It’s an occasional thing. Like anal. Sort of. Well you get the point. It’s not something to be doing every single time you have sex. No, despite the allure and ease of just having a quick bang, the key to a good sex life is variety. And variety cannot be achieved in those fun, but fleeting few minutes. So the first thing to ask when you are considering the merits of your foreplay game is this; are you in a rush? If you’re honest with yourself and you know that you don’t put the time into the foreplay anymore then that is the first thing you need to fix. Take your time, move slow, explore! I’ve said it before, if you’re a dude, you’re going to bust that good nut anyway, so you may as well do your utmost to ensure she gets there with you! And if you’re a woman, well the more excited a guy is, the more he’s going to want to please you, so it makes sense for you to put the time in and get him on the verge of sexual insanity!

So now you’re taking the time, the next question is; what about the variety? I’m sure the majority of people have at some point or another been in a relationship where the sex is more formula than euphoria. The same set of moves endlessly repeating themselves. For example: Kiss. Blowjob. Go down on her. Missionary. Doggy. And I may be pushing the boat out with the oral stuff for some couples! The point is, it becomes routine. The excitement of the past replaced by a sense of sexual duty and carnal need meshed with lack of motivation. A poor state of affairs really. Sure it’s still sex, but is it the kind of sex you dream about? Probably not.

I’ve said this in a few of my other blogs, but it’s worth saying again; you have to explore each others bodies. Don’t be that guy who comes with that weak sauce sex game that goes straight for the tits, sticks a finger in and then thinks ‘Boom, let’s do this’, whips his cock out and starts banging away. That F stroke is getting you nowhere! Likewise, don’t be that girl who gives a ten minute wank but then a 10 second blowjob. Explore! Explore explore explore! Her neck, her back, her thighs, her sides, her arse…not too mention the places like her ear lobes, her feet (if she’s not ticklish) or her collarbone. Her tits are still going to be there. And you’re going to get between her legs eventually. So take your time on these other areas, maybe not all in one session, but you get the point. Touch her all over. And ladies, we love you playing with our cock, obviously. But we also like a girl taking her time with our body. Kissing down our chest and stomach, teasing us and then finally giving that slow wet BJ that will have us wondering how the hell we ever existed without you.

So anyway, I’ve going to leave it there. We could go on into more specifics, and the comment section or Twitter is always there for that, but for now, the main points are; take your time and be adventurous! Be exciting! Show your partner or new lover the you that you want them to see…or maybe a you that you never thought you could be! Be wild, be saucy…be whatever the fuck you want! Just be passionate with it! Need it, crave it, and love every second of it. Surrender to it in full and I guarantee the next time you think about the question of how good your foreplay is…well it won’t really be a question anymore. So what are you waiting for? The best sex you’ve ever had could be only moments away.

Well…hopefully not moments.